Working On: Being Thankful For My Sickness

For those of you that haven't heard the latest news in our family yet, I am pregnant and child(ren) #3 is in route-am I loving pregnancy? Not so much-there are some women-I happen to be friends with a few of them-who love everything about being pregnant-who might experience nausea maybe one time in their pregnancy and don't gain weightt anywhere other than their belly.....well that is definitely not me.

Pregnancy makes my skin oily and acne prone, I can't seem to poop right(sorry I know probably a little too much info.) and sleep is a nice thought. I did not expect to feel so upset about my body....I was diligent for 2 years in getting my body healthy and in shape and now I struggle as I feel my muscles deteriorate and slowly turn to flab. Feeling pretty-a thing of the past.  I stated to Daniel the other day that it would be very convenient if I could just be put to sleep until the 9 months is at an end-just wake me up when it is time to push:)

Sickness and depression have been my constant and faithful companions these past couple weeks and still threaten to linger a little longer. I have come to the conclusion that I am a wimp-whose weakness is long term sickness-I envy those who do it without complaints-please forgive me for mine.

Yet amongst my struggling-I can't help put be amazed at the love my God has for me. He has blessed me so much in the last three months and has opened my eyes to things I would have never realized without his help. I have met and talked to NUMEROUS women-some with whom I associate with on a weekly basis, and others whom I have never talked to before who would give anything to trade me for my pain and sickness just to have the opportunity to have a child.

One woman can get pregnant but has not been able to carry it past three months. Another woman has kidney problems and high blood pressure-the two kids she was able to have lead to preclampsia, weeks of being bed ridden, and time in the NICU for both babies. Her doctor has told her that she cannot have anymore children without it being a serious risk to her life.

Another woman cannot have children at all and the baby her and her husband were able to adopt, shortly died of sickness.I have talked to women who take one to two years to get pregnant when it has taken only 2 months each time to get pregnant with each of my children.My heart aches for these women who want so badly to fulfill their maternal role in life-to nurture and love children of their own.  I know that these women were sent to tell me their stories to open my eyes to the fact that I am extremely blessed for the gift I have been given to have risk free and uncomplicated pregnancies that have resulted in some of the greatest blessings I could have ever asked for-my children. For this, I can be thankful in my sickness.